Everyone wants to find love. But while there is someone out there for everyone, finding that special person can be one of the hardest challenges that anyone ever faces. Worse still, the longer it goes on, the harder it can begin to feel.
This is especially true if you don’t understand the reasons why you’ve currently failed to find a lasting bond. Whether you’ve just come out of a relationship or you’re a serial dater with lots of bad experiences, these reasons could be the source of your problems. Identify them today, and you’ll have a far better shot at finding love tomorrow.
#1. No closure
There’s little point in starting a new relationship, even a casual one, if the old bond is holding you back. Remaining civil and moving on after a divorce isn’t always easy, but it’s vital that you do. This is central for your future happiness as well as your children. Letting your ex’s faults prevent you from finding true love is simply not the answer. Draw a line under things, and you’ll have a far stronger platform for the future. Even if it doesn’t impact your dates, it will enhance your life.
#2. Unhappy with yourself
Before learning to love someone else, you must first discover how to love yourself once more. It’s natural for your confidence to be at a low point following a difficult breakup or long time of being single. However, focusing on personal goals and taking up new hobbies is one of the most positive steps you’ll ever take. Even if it doesn’t directly help you find romance, the reward of being more comfortable in your skin will vindicate those actions. This is the least you deserve.
#3. Not knowing what you want
Different women want different things from dating. While some simply want a sexual fling others have their eyes set on marriage and kids. Likewise, the time frames that you put on those goals can be influenced by a host of factors including your age, career, and lifestyle. Whatever the situation may be, it’s impossible to find the right solution if you don’t want you’re looking for. Taking some time to actually discover what you want from dating is, therefore, an essential factor.
#4. Too focused on looks
Physical attraction is an important aspect of dating and relationships. Unfortunately, in a world of dating Apps and sites, it’s very easy to act solely on this factor. Ignoring all of the other aspects, such as shared passions and compatible personalities will reduce your hopes of finding ‘the one’. Phone chat lines offer a great alternative as you can get to know the person before meeting. Talking is often a far greater stimulant than simply swiping right anyway.
#5. Placing too much pressure on dating
Dating can be a pressurized environment, but only if you let it become one. Ultimately, the worst thing that will happen is that you’ve wasted a few hours of your life. Still, try to find fun date ideas and you’ll enjoy the event even if the chemistry isn’t there. Crucially, removing the pressure can actively allow you to be yourself. Frankly, this in itself can be one of the most significant factors in your bid to hit it off with someone from the very start.
#6. Fear of getting hurt
Very few people are lucky enough to find their soulmate at the very attempt. As the old saying goes, you have to kiss a few frogs before finding your prince. This can naturally leave you in a position where you fear getting hurt by future love interests. Whether you like it or not, you’ll just have to swallow those worries and take a leap of faith. Getting hurt again is never much fun, although it’s never as harsh as the first heartbreak. When you find ‘the one’, those issues will seem worthwhile.
#7.You want someone else
Everyone has crushes in life, especially when single. However, if you are seriously fixated on one person, it can harm any dates or relationships that you enter. As with broken relationships, finding a sense of closure is key. You can either tell your crush how you feel or find a way to get over them. Whichever option you choose, ending the unrequited love interest is pivotal. Not only will this allow you to move on in relationships. It’ll additionally enable you to move on in life.
#8. Not accepting your true sexuality
If several dates and relationships have failed, it could be due to many different reasons. However, it’s possible that the lack of chemistry isn’t down to their individual personalities. Coming to terms with the fact that you’re gay isn’t easy, especially as an over 25. Nonetheless, if this is the way that you’re naturally inclined, fighting the truth will only lead to further disappointments in love. That’s not to say that your first gay relationship will be ‘the one’, but the chances will be 100% higher.
#9. No pride in your appearance
It might sound brutally honest, but you won’t find love without maximizing your natural charms. That’s not to suggest that you need to start looking like Beyonce or Jennifer Lawrence. Still, you cannot expect someone else to find you physically attractive if you can’t even take the time to embrace your positives. Apart from anything else, it sends signals that you don’t care about impressing them. If your date feels like that, they are unlikely to pursue any feelings they may have.
#10. You’re not prepared to work
Reality check: relationships don’t work like they do in the movies. Even the greatest lovers have ups and downs, including arguments. Nobody is perfect, and working your way through those faults is essential if the passion is going to last. If you give up at the first hurdle, you’ll be unlikely to ever enjoy a relationship that lasts longer than a few months. In truth, if you’re not ready to work at things, you’re not ready for a relationship altogether.