Many abusive relationships begin with tension building, performing the abuse, making amends, and becoming calm. Then again, if the abuser is a self-absorbed individual, the cycle is altered. They deny any fault in the abuse, which causes the back end of the cycle to change. The cycle for a self-centered individual feels threatened, abuses others, becomes the victim, and feels empowered. Here are four steps to help you break the cycle if you’re a victim of domestic.
It is best to prepare yourself for leaving your abuser in steps. You should take the time to set some money aside in a new secret bank account for an easy escape. Have your statements sent to a secretive post office box or electronically sent to a secret email address. Next, leave the abuser when it is safe, such as when they are at work or visiting a friend. Be sure to provide enough time to gather essential documents like passports, birth certificates, and other significant paperwork. Also, have a destination in mind where the abuser would not find you.
Get Counseling for Yourself
Getting counseling will help you to learn the abusive cycle, the red flags to avoid, and how to remain strong. It will also teach you how to spot an abusive relationship before getting in too deep. Some of the more frequent signs of an abuser are, bottling up their emotions, unwilling to compromise, judgmental, co-dependent, and controlling. Counseling will provide you with the resources that can help you stand on your own. These resources may consist of financial services, legal advice, services for your children, and job training.
Boost Your Emotional State
Don’t isolate yourself. Instead, reach out to family and friends to help you through your life changes. They can help you to reduce your stress, depression, self-esteem that you were forced to endure. Go to a support group for abusive individuals. It sometimes helps to know that you are not alone and there are others who have suffered from abuse as well. Going to the gym can also help you to release some stress.
Seek Legal Action
It is not okay for someone to continuously abuse their spouse, loved ones, or others. Take action to have the cycle stopped. Seek legal help to prevent it from happening again and make them face the consequences of their actions. In most cases, the abuser will be court ordered to attend counseling for anger management and other counseling regiments. They also will most likely have a protection from abuse (PFA) order against them. By taking legal action, you will help to break the cycle for you and the abuser.
Take action today to get yourself or a loved one out of the cycle of abuse. Look for resources that will assist those who are in an abusive relationship.